![]() I'm writing this on tracing paper because I believe it represents everything I want to say to you. What would it have been like if I tried? Still I never let it slip.īecause despite my best effort, and my ability to believe- the lights went out regardless. I'll just flicker away like a candle as your battery slowly dies out. Remember how it felt for me to compensate for every time you dropped the ball? Because if I know anything about you, it's that you never tried to hard for something you didn't believe in.Īnd the ticking of your time bomb is slowly fading in the distance and I believe my hearts begun to dread the cold reality that this is it. And so I suppose for you it was simply a touch of road work, for a good cause, but none the less with a purpose of creating a new path. Yet for me it resonated through my chest like speeding cars on a highway- maybe a bit exaggerated but always with a destination. ![]() I know what it's like to be set off by the sound of someone's voice. I'm sorry for all the times I've said, 'and' as if there's something more than there really is. Because I won't stop drinking until I'm sober- till my head stops changing at me, 'could you imagine what it'd be like if you loved me like you did when you didn't have to try?' Even if the sickening reality is because, you didn't.Īnd I'm terribly sorry for all the times I've inconvenienced you with my presence. I don't need you like air, I need you like a toxin- filling my lungs and raking you nails over the cavity of my chest- suffocating.Īnd maybe it's time for those shots now. We've poisoned ourselves with our actions and they're fading away like worthless memories getting caught in the smoke of a cheap cigarette and that's what I need. You're out there and in all technicalities, in my reach. That we're trapped in this space as maximum capacity, and oh yes- somewhere out there you're living.Īnd I was never one to say if you've been missing me or not, but point be proven you're out there. ![]() I just didn't know it at the time.Īnd how odd is it to know I'll probably never see you again? I'm picking at the seams of this mattress and knowing with each second you're putting miles between my decisions. I poisoned myself with you, but oddly enough death was never upon me till my body started to pull back from you- withdraw. Because we live this life day in and day out, and if I've learned anything from you, is that life is simply validating yourself in the eyes of someone else, poisoning your own body just to prove you've been closer to death. When I say I can't live without you, I think I really mean without you I'd slowly live less. More often then not all I can seem to feel bad about is the fact this poem is titled 'Someone I Don't Care About.'īecause I don't have to care about you to crave the silence of your company- your chest ticking like a clock and the more I think about it, I've come to believe you are more so a bomb- bringing me closer to something desolating with each pickup of your heart. So I won't tell you not to go, because what would I say?īecause I'll be an artifact of my own mind, and the dusty lamp on the nightstand is enough to cast a glow on my conscious and more often then not it's empty. ![]() But maybe it'd be a nice change of pace to be vacated. ![]() The kind of love that powers a fading motel sign that reads, 'No Vacancy.' Because I'm nothing more than a minimum wage cleaning of stale sheets and a not so safe alley. I need a hug or one to many shots of vodka.Īnd god I wish you'd fallen in love with me. I don't think I'd be smart enough to take a different route. ![]()
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